Friday, June 25, 2010

Chemo Day!

How on earth does an 'end stage' cancer patient wake up and face a second round 
of poisonous chemo with a smile on the face?  
Well, sit back, pour yourself a glass of red wine, dig up a piece of that 'sinfully delicious' 70% cocoa chocolate you've got stashed away in the back of your sock drawer 
(relax, both items are scientifically sanctioned as cancer fighters - Woot!) 
and I will give you an eye-witness account:
First of all, we asked for specific prayer for a restful, rejuvenating sleep after our harrowing experience with the CT scanner in Munich yesterday and voila! .... Mom rec'd the best nights sleep she's had in months!  I tiptoed into her room at 7:30 am and accidentally woke her up....
Then I sheepishly - hastily - retreated to my own room, berating myself all down the hallway for doubting the power of your prayers.
Lesson 101 in Letting go and Letting God means exactly that.  
So shut-up Joanne and take your lumps!
Add to this scenario - a sky full of brilliant delicious warmth and a terrace breakfast bathed in sunshine and Mom's near perfect readings for blood pressure and sugar levels
and I am humbled to the core.
The grounds behind the Leonardis clinic
Mom's arm is getting back to a new normal and spends the whole morning outside with her IV pole hovering over us - soaking in the herbal chemo infusions with one side of the body and packing a mean six dice round with the other.  Trouncing me, truth be told!

I decide to get ruthless.....
I wander off below with my camera and leave her reading instead. 
 Enough punishment!
In it's heyday - this clinic must have grown all its own organic veggies and herbs.
It looks like it's still being used despite it's decrepit state....
This appears to be a neglected chicken coop?  The eggs we eat at breakfast at definitely free range - very orange coloured yolks.  But I don't think the layers live around here anymore.
I'm approaching an official Norfolk Pine growing in it's natural habitat.
That's cool.  I once had one in my living room back home.  Picked it up from a Garden Centre and managed to keep it alive for, oh say -  about 4 months.  :)  
No green thumb here.  Never was and never will be.


So I can't keep them alive if my own life depended on it, but I can admire them in the place they were meant to grow.  That's got to count for something!
Coming back up thru the environmentally protected area to check on Mom and see if she's noticed that I've abandoned her yet.  LOL.  
Then Doctor D came by to visit us.  He outlined the afternoon procedure and told us
to prepare for a 3 to 4 hour marathon in the chemo chair - said he'd wire Mom up to EECP (Enhanced External CounterPulsation) which is admittedly, a somewhat outdated method of enhancing peripheral blood circulation during the chemo treatment.  Wait till you see what THAT looks like! (below)  
He proceeded to confirm what Mom had already long suspected:
the CT scan shows that her tumours have already grown & multiplied from last months' CT images
taken at the Juravinski Centre.  Her cancer is terminal and very aggressive.

Do you know what my mother did when he left our table??

She smoothed out the tablecloth with resolute precision, turned to our interrupted game of six dice
and said,"Who's turn is it?"
Why am I so continually surprised by this woman?
When am I ever going to 'get it'?
Chemo IV's have a distinct ominous look about them but nothing compared to this EECP bed that she allowed herself to be strapped into.  It fired up with a loud drone and pulsated so strongly, Mom's body jerked up a few inches every few seconds.  The surprise was so great we laughed hysterically till I couldn't decide if Mom was laughing or crying.  But no.  She was laughing and of course, felt the need for a bathroom not too long afterward.  She hung in there for another half hour only because I threatened to scour the cupboards for the depends supply ... so with one chemo down and one to go - she voluntarily disengaged herself from that indignity and decided to get her blood circulating with a good old-fashioned walk around the block after chemo instead!  
Pfft!  Stupid thing looks like some kind of execution device!
It only testifies to Mom's strong constitution and commitment to putting up the best possible fight 
despite all odds for increasing her survival time.
I think we'll stick to this room with the full body massage water bed. Yes sirree! 
We're going to spend a lot more time on this side of the lower level for sure.

Do you see the ant in this peony?  
Did you know that a peony needs ants to open up its bud and blossom?
Such infinitesimal breathtaking detail in our fallen world.
Can you imagine yourself under the constant watch and care of such a Creator?
This is how my mother faces second line treatment for metastisized breast cancer 
with a smile on her face:
She lives out Lesson 101 on Letting Go and Letting God.
All you prayer warriors out there?  Keep at it, cuz it's working.
  Praise be to God!

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Wednesdays Sun

We were'nt the only ones soaking up a long absent sunshine.
Charging shamelessly 25 paces ahead of me.

We stopped by the local Goldsmith at the recommendation of another in house patient, a miner from South Africa (struggling with colon cancer) who said the man's prices were still reflecting gold values of 2002.  What do we know?  Sounds good.  Looks like gold, smells like gold, so it must be.


Isn't this the cutest little conifer?  It was in a planter pretending to be an annual or something.  
It was bearing cones!

Behold.  My favourite annual in my favourite colour.
The local market sells fresh fruit & veggies, all sundry and includes a delicatessen and a considerable wine collection.  Bellingham Shiraz/Cab blend from South Africa 2008 takes a prize.  At $4.79 it tastes like more.  We came for the wine, some better shampoo for me and some crackers for mom which will come in handy when she starts her chemo.
One of the big 'Clydesdales' and her offspring finally enjoyed a day out as well.
Clearly, the bottle on the left is shampoo.
Clearly, the one on the right is not.
I used Google Translator on every single word on that bottle and not ONCE, did the word shampoo pop up.  Words like coiling, hair care to tips, and then Haarpflege which is conditions.
Ugh.  That accounts for a whole week of bad hair days.  
But whew, now I can stop thinking about the chemo wig too.

Sunshine on My Shoulders

I awoke this morning and actually had to squint to see out the windows!


The sun has finally broke through the clouds here in southern Germany.
What a difference that makes to the view - literally and psychologically.
I stepped into the hall to check up on Mumsie, her door was open and indeed -
a brilliant shaft of light was streaming through her room as well.
Sun on both sides of the building!
 - we are amazed and thankful!  :)
Went down to breakfast and ordered our 7 minute boiled eggs on light rye bread.
Alas - we had to reorder the eggs since neither one of us could handle they way they 
ran out of their shells. 
We laughed ourselves silly demonstrating to each other 
what happens to our gag reflex when we even see that 'stuff' on our plates....
Mom starts her day off with the alternative therapies.  For all you purists out there, that translates into:  
Selenium, Glutathion, Hepa Merz, Vitamin C, L-ornithin aspertate.
Today we're starting a 7 day cycle of two herbal cancer fighting agents:
Paw Paw (Canadian grown!) and Artemisinin (not available in North America) 
I am knitting a pair of socks and here I am modeling them...
No actually, I'm just pretending to be on some kind of wooline intravenous here.
But seriously now, 
I am modeling a close-up of them because I am so pathetically proud of myself  :)
Mom is resting comfortably at the moment as we're about to take a stroll in the sunshine 
*YAY!*
- to the local convenience store to buy some wine.  
*YAY* again!

Thoughts on Life from trustworthy sources

I lift up my eyes to the hills-
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.  
Psalm 121:1,2








“You will never know how much you believe something until it is a matter of life and death.” “If you think of this world as a place intended simply for our happiness, you find it quite intolerable: think of it as a place of training and correction and it’s not so bad.” 
– God in the Dock, page 52  
--C.S.Lewis








In this world you will have tribulation, but be of good cheer, 
for I have overcome the world. 
--Jesus Christ

The world is full of suffering, it is also full of overcoming it. 
--Helen Keller

Sunday, June 20, 2010

Sunday Morning Stroll in the Rain

 There is something almost 'spiritual' about a very quiet Sunday morning stroll in an old traditional Bavarian town with its inimitable sounds of tolling bells
and singing wet woodland birds.
I trust you will enjoy it with me again....
Okay, okay.  These first two don't come from my camera, true.
But all the rest of these do.....and they are published in chronological order of my stroll as well.
I had all 70 pic's arranged in a slideshow and set to Rachmaninov's Piano Concerto No. 2 in C Minor 
but alas, I couldn't upload it to my blog for love or money.  Pfft!  
Now you have to do the walkabout sans serene music.  :(







Listened to a sermon online today and have to think about the fact that I serve a RISEN Saviour.
The cross is paramount to my faith but the resurrection is what propels it and drives me forward!
You will see several pictures of massive Copper Beech trees. While they are a personal favourite of mine (yes, I have favourite trees), I publish them mainly as an educational opportunity for my sweet sister, who, though we have grown up side by side in the same nursery tree environment
all our lives and who,
even works in that business to this date.... does not know what said tree looks like.
I hereby suggest that TreeTagging 101 should be mandatory for all nursery office secretaries.
Paid hours of course - with a Starbucks in hand.






So there you have it sista.  Copper Beech's in all their immense glory.
More is on it's way but right now, I have a chance to Skype with my husband and YIPPEE,
THAT is not going to wait!!
One sweet hour lapse of time passes....


Hey Richie?  Identify this for me please...
(I don't do perennials very well)



Stumbled across Mr. Tumnus in the bushes.  Boys are so yucky.

C'mon y'know Mr.Tumnus - meets Lucy by the lamp-post in Narnia?

The rear of the Leonardis Klinik

That upper balcony to the left is my room.  Fortunately, there's an overhang so I can still stand out of the rain (which has not stopped since we've arrived) to enjoy the mountain air.




Somewhere out there - is a very big mountain range....









And now I submit evidence of the farm that is literally 200 steps from the Klinik (I counted them:)
This is the 'front lawn' of an old traditional Bavarian Working Farm.  I couldn't spot the Clydesdales anywhere (I did smell them tho') & when I see them next, I hope to have the camera in hand.  




Exhibit A -The horse trailer


And full circle back 'home' (for a little while longer)

My beautiful strong mom.  When I grow up, I want to be like her.
   Hans found a bottle of Italian Merlot.  
*sigh*